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I’m late with my posting this week because I’ve added something new to my life. I’m now bookkeeping for two. My mom is no longer comfortable managing her accounts so I have taken them over. The task of setting it up was time consuming and a bit of a puzzle---hence the late posting.
Fortunately, since I live an hour away from mom, I can manage her bookkeeping from home now and no longer have to make an emergency trip north. I visit her once or twice a week but of course that doesn’t always coincide with her financial needs. Now I can help her out and I’m simply a phone call away.
It’s easier to help seniors in our families today with online banking. In fact, with online anything. We don’t bank at the same bank but I set her up with online banking through her own bank. I have access to her email and bank account passwords and everything I need to keep her going. Lately she’s had a number of confusions over payments and/or the lack thereof!
During the set-up period we had extra visits and quite a few phone calls. I decided to begin all of her banking record-keeping from January 2011 forward and used my money management software to begin. It’s all done now and Wednesday we pay her bills for the first time on my shift. I set up a few auto payments but some she prefers to pay at a time she designates. I know what they are and will await direction but if she doesn’t let me know I can give her a call before it’s late.
At first she was a little reluctant to let go of such an important task but lately she’s forgotten to tend to it in the way she had been and she seemed relieved that I was willing to take it over. The same process occurred when I set up her online medication auto processing. No more last minute dashes to the pharmacy. It all comes to her directly now based on the computer’s estimation of her needs and an email is sent which I read.
Mom was set up on the computer and used it for quite a while but she has forgotten how to get on and off and she doesn’t use it anymore. It was a great tool that she enjoyed and she was able to order things she needed online since she isn’t able to drive or shop anymore. But as things change we adjust and move forward. We don’t look back.
Mom’s memory has gotten to the point that without online banking she might have experienced unpleasant “issues” and this has been a tremendous relief---for me. She is relieved, of course, but not nearly as much as I am. I was terrified she would miss an important payment of some kind and have her utilities cut off or receive a nursing home eviction for my dad.
But all of this isn’t without its emotional toll either. It seems every few weeks now changes occur that knock me off my feet. I’ve invited her to come and live with me and my sister and brother-in-law helped me try to convince her but she won’t budge. Short of a court order she’s staying put. I don’t blame her but of course we all worry about her.
I set her up with one of those home medical alert systems. She wears a little button around her neck and seems to understand its use. I’ve explained it’s for all emergencies, not just medical, and she seems to understand that she must press the button for ANY emergency. The company I selected was fantastic and I loved their customer service.
My dad is in a nursing home and has been for many years, my aunt passed away a few weeks ago, and changes are occurring with my mom faster than I’m willing to accept. One day at a time.
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